I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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