I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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