I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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