Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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