Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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