i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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