This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
