at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Is it because I queefed?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
