We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
