pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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