i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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