i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize