i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
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i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
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In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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