she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
Randomize