I look better un-naked...
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Send help, water and tortillas.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
