She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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