Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
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