I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize