Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
