There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
