Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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