Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
