who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
