erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Randomize
