he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
high people should be assigned attendants
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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