birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
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