i think my tv is drunk
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Randomize
