Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
We are two peas in an std pod
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
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