why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
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