I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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