Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
