a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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