so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Who died my cat blue again?
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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