I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize
