what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize
