will power is for people who don't want to get laid
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
