Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
we have pet lesbian snakes
I need to stop coming to work sober
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
