she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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