Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
