addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
party gras won. party gras always wins.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Randomize
