piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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