Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
