I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize