I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Randomize
