i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
