Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
