think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
jump out the window naked night went bad
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
