I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
She's JV to your varsity
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
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