i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize