you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
